Lake Worth City Commissioner Andy Amoroso kisses a pig.

The rainy season is upon us, and snowbirds are fleeing fast. To honor the hard-working natives who slog through the summer to make South Florida great, the Pulp is compiling jokes about them. Feel free to add your own.

First up, you know you're from Lake Worth when...

10. The first person you talk to in the morning is the homeless guy who sleeps in the Cultural Plaza downtown.

9. Your city commissioner runs a shop that sells dildos.

8. You look down on anyone who has fewer than four tattoos.

7. Justin Bieber earns the wrath of your favorite barkeep.

6. Once a year, you walk outside to find people painting with chalk in the streets.

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Kim Sargent

"Wild Bill" Koch is no longer flying under the radar.

Bill Koch, the Palm Beach billionaire who criticized his brothers' support of libertarian causes and has long escaped notice on the national political stage, is emerging as a major supporter of Mitt Romney.

Huron Carbon, a subsidiary of Koch's West Palm Beach-based Oxbow Corp., donated $1 million to Romney's Restore Our Future "super PAC" last month. That brings Koch's Restore Our Future donations to a total of $2 million, including $750,000 Oxbow contributed last year and $250,000 Koch gave on his own.

Such visible support of the GOP presidential candidate has attracted national media attention to Koch, who was once known more for his wine collection and romantic entanglements. When New Times published a profile of Koch last August, his spokesman, Brad Goldstein, said Koch's political leanings
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Pembleton Farms.com

Pembleton urged Goodman to call 911.

​Lisa Pembleton doesn't drink. Neither do her friends.

"I don't hang out with those kind of people," she said on the witness stand in a West Palm Beach courtroom today.

Her sobriety is just one of many stark differences between Pembleton, a horse trainer and student of the equestrian sport of dressage, and Wellington polo mogul John Goodman. Pembleton spent her days and nights grooming horses during the winter of 2010, living in a trailer next to a barn. Goodman is a multimillionaire who founded the International Polo Club in Wellington, and was out partying the night before he met Pembleton.

Yet this sober, God-fearing, 28-year-old horse trainer is the prosecution's star witness in Goodman's DUI manslaughter case. She's the first person who saw Goodman after the car accident that led toMore >>

​As an 18-year-old vomited, lost control of his bowels, and died slowly in a West Palm Beach juvenile jail cell last July, guards refused to call 911 for more than six hours. A supervisor on duty allegedly thought Eric Perez was faking his illness, although the teenager had twice injured his head before the vomiting began, according to a grand jury report released yesterday on the incident.

"It is indisputable that, given the conduct of the detention officers, Mr. Perez never had the chance to survive," the report says.

Perez died July 10, 2011 of a cerebral hemorrhage. But  the grand jury declined to charge anyone involved with homicide, because experts could not determine exactly what caused
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Improbable as it may sound, there is an entire television series devoted to people who hire hit men to kill their loved/hated ones. The Investigation Discovery show Nothing Personal is hosted by Steve Schirripa, the jovial comedian who played Bobby Baccalieri on The Sopranos. Now he uses his mobster street cred to narrate true-crime dramas about women who plot to kill their husbands -- women like Boynton Beach's own Dalia Dippolito.

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Flickr user: kevitivity

Murders are up, larceny is down.

​Palm Beach County's first murder of 2012 broke Belle Glade's heart. Jimmy McMillan, 49, was gunned down in the grocery store his family had owned for seven decades. He was a generous man and champion fisherman, known for giving away food and letting longtime customers buy on credit. His death made headlines for weeks; a $25,000 reward was offered to find his killer.

Yet he was hardly alone. Before McMillan's tragedy, 11 murders rocked Belle Glade in 2011. According to crime statistics presented to the Palm Beach County Commission this week, that's nearly three times the homicide total from the year before. In 2010, just four people were killed; three died in 2009. For a More >>

Bradshaw likes barbecue grills.

​When Tiger Woods tees off at the Honda Classic golf tournament in Palm Beach Gardens today, a sign of local political rancor will be flying over his head.

An airplane banner proclaiming "The Sheriff Is a Thief -- PBSOTalk.com" is slated to circle over PGA National, after making appearances at the Palm Beach County courthouse and jail today.

The message comes courtesy of former Palm Beach County sheriff's deputy Mark Dougan, who has been railing against Sheriff Ric Bradshaw on his website, PBSOTalk.com, for about a year now. "I never liked the corruption that went on in the sheriff's office," Dougan says.

On his website, Dougan cites a scandal from 1985, when Bradshaw was a major in the West Palm Beach police department and was punished for allegedly stealing a gun from the evidence room.
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Flickr user: distar97

This is not the way to answer the phone.

​If you've always wanted to learn how to polish silver, fold linens, or serve a six-course dinner to spoiled rich kids, here's your chance.

The City of West Palm Beach is offering free, totally unironic classes on "How to Work in a Wealthy Home." You too can scrub the bathtub and serve British tea, just like the hard-working hotties on Downton Abbey.

For two hours every Thursday, the city-funded Vickers House holds classes on vital subjects such as "Duties in the House or Estate," "Answering the Phone," "The Household Directory," "Greeting Guests," and "Polishing Sterling." Tomorrow's class, which will be the sixth week of the nine-week course, covers items such as "China Care" and "The Everyday Table Setting."

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Palm Beach County Sheriff's Office

I swear I saw it blink.

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