Shirley Ann Duncan was given over $1,000 in donations, including housewares, clothes and furniture, thanks to the selfless generosity of a Port Charlotte church when she told them that her four sons were killed in combat overseas in Iraq and Afghanistan.

The church even held a memorial service for the fallen heroes.

Also, she only actually has two sons.

Also, none of her sons were actually dead.

Because she lied.

One of them is in the Army, though. That part is true. So it wasn't all complete bullshit.

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F. Scott Fitzgerald certainly laid it out best about the rich: they are different from you and me.

The Palm Beach society battle between the heirs of the National Enquirerfortune has shifted into high-gear again. As well told you earlier this month, Paul Pope and his mother Lois have been playing out an odd legal joust for the last 20 years. At stake is the controlling chunk of the $415 million payout from the 1989 sale of the tabloid. Depending on who's telling the tale, in one corner you have a harassed old lady or a wasteful socialite; in the other, a son concerned about his family legacy or a conniving party boy. The latter's slash-and-burn PR campaign against his mother put him in handcuffs last week on charges of stalking.

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A Bradenton woman wanted to get it on with her boyfriend, so she started touching him. However, the boyfriend wasn't feeling up to it for some reason and kept turning down her advances as the two lay in bed.

So the woman had a reasonable enough response to his rejections.

She bit him.

On the dick.

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Facebook

Earlier this week, trial began for a Broward couple who allegedly imprisoned wayward and young women, drugged them, and then forced them to work as prostitutes -- under the constant threat of beatings.

The accused 34-year-old ringleader, Mackenley Desire, who prosecutors say directed his 20-year-old wife, Genet Rembert, to beat down temperamental women, was also fairly creative with nicknames.

For example, he called Rembert "Fire," and he liked to be called "Daddy."

But on Facebook, Daddy had only one name: Mack Deal.

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(Volusia County Branch Jail)

Kids.

They can be a such a nuisance. Especially when you just want to go shopping for stuff.

Amerite?

One Volusia County mother thought so. So she left her 9-year-old and 4-year-old inside their trailer home, padlocked it, and went shopping at the local Dollar General Store.

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A man from Illinois was honeymooning with his new bride in Orlando when he allegedly decided to leave their honeymoon suite at the Omni Hotel in Champions Gate to go pay another woman for sex.

The newlywed woman had noticed her man had gone missing and called the cops. She would soon learn that her husband had left her to hook up with a lady of the evening.

(The first sign that this fella was bad news might've been that he chose Orlando as their honeymoon destination -- but that's just us.)

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Two South Florida identity thieves the feds have been trying to nab were caught after one of them couldn't resist Instagraming a picture of his food at Morton's the Steakhouse in Fort Lauderdale.

Nathaniel Troy Maye, 44, who claims to have stolen 700,000 identities, and his lady friend, Tiwanna Tenise Thomason, 39, are facing up to 12 years in prison after Maye just had to take a picture of his food and share it with people on the internet.

That'll learn ya, food-porn-loving people!

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James Minyard, 41, of Tampa never finished school, and wanted to start and finish a difficult job just to prove that he could. So, instead of learning how to play the guitar or taking up scuba diving, like most people would, he took up building homemade bombs. And then he proceeded to blow off parts of his middle and ring fingers with one of them.

According to police, Minyard learned how to make the bombs via the internet and began building them from his parents' home. He then blew off his fingers and had to be rushed Tampa General.

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In case you've forgotten, Sunday is Mother's Day. And while you might be scrambling to buy your mom $2 flowers from a gas station or getting her yet another Hallmark card with kittens on it from the CVS down the street (again!), maybe you want to remember that you have only one mother.

And maybe you should be thankful it wasn't one of these mothers that the universe seemed fit to give you.

Here are six Florida moms who will make you thankful for your own mom (and maybe motivate you to actually do something nice for yours this Sunday):

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