Hey, Jeb Bush: Marijuana Won't Kill Florida's Tourism

Categories: Floriderp

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Gage Skidmore via Flickr Creative Commons
Former governor wants Florida to stay kid-friendly. You know, like Disney World. That's why people shouldn't vote yes on Amendment Two in November. In a statement released yesterday, Dubya's brother put it this way:

"Florida leaders and citizens have worked for years to make the Sunshine State a world-class location to start or run a business, a family-friendly destination for tourism and a desirable place to raise a family or retire.

See also: Anti-Medical Marijuana Group Insinuates Pot Cookies Will Be Used for Rape

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81-Year-Old Boca Man Pulls Gun on Teen During Road Rage Incident

Categories: Floriderp

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PBSO
An 81-year-old man not only cut off an 18-year-old driver on a Boca Raton road but then proceeded to pull a gun on the kid as well.

Because, Florida.

According to Boca Police, the elderly man, Irving Feingold, pulled a .380 caliber pistol on an 18-year-old after cutting off the teen in his Cadillac and then getting into an argument with him.

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Deerfield Beach Man Takes Four Young Sons on Robbery Spree

Categories: Floriderp

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(BSO)
A Deerfield Beach man was busted for breaking into a home and stealing appliances. According to the Broward Sheriff's Office, the man had two accomplices -- his teenaged sons.

The two boys -- ages 15 and 16 -- helped their dad haul away the merchandise but were foiled when a witness spotted them coming out of a house with stuff that didn't belong to them.

And people complain that too many fathers just don't spend any quality time with their kids.

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Florida Judge Denies Sex Offender's Request to Be Physically Castrated

Categories: Floriderp

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Courtesy of Wikimedia Commons
Lester Leroy Williams is serving ten years in prison for sexually battering a child. Back in 2008, he was also sentenced to 4.5 years of probation. Recently, the 35-year-old Williams made a bizarre request: He wants the state to physically castrate him.

In a letter Williams wrote at the Union Correctional Institution in Raiford, he asked Fifth Judicial Circuit Court Judge Hale Stancil to modify his sentence to include castration at the expense of the state. But Stancil denied the unusual request this past Tuesday, stating his court didn't have jurisdiction to rule over the case.

"In 32 years, I have never had this request before," said Stancil, who spoke about the case for the first time to New Times. "I know there is chemical castration, but I've never had an inmate ask to be physically castrated before. I don't think I have authority as a judge to order such a thing."


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The Alliance for Solar Choice Vows to Fight Florida Power Utilities

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Roto Frank AG via Wikimedia Commons
Florida's solar industry might be up against the ropes, but it's vowing to fight on. As we reported a few weeks back, the small but feisty solar industry -- with an assist from the Alliance for Solar Choice (TASC), a national group pushing sun energy -- is trying to outlive the kibosh coming from Florida's all-powerful utilities. And although it's lost an important bid to enter current state discussions on the industry's future, there's a growing grassroots push for more solar options.


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Florida Woman in Lingerie Tries to Run Over Cop in Nordstrom Parking Lot

Categories: Floriderp

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Wikimedia Commons
Can't a woman sleep in her lingerie in her car in the parking lot of a Nordstrom in peace?

Apparently not.

Boca Raton Police officers asked one woman dressed in lingerie and sleeping in her car to get out of her vehicle.

AND THEY NEARLY PAID WITH THEIR LIVES.

According to an arrest report, the woman woke up, locked the car doors, and then proceeded to try to run over a police officer. That'll learn ya, police officer.

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Florida Men Break Into Restaurant, Steal 640 Pounds of Fish

Categories: Floriderp

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courtesy BSO
If the economy ever gets so bad that fish becomes our new currency, these two Dania Beach thieves are going to be Rockefellers.

The Broward Sheriff's Office says two men broke into the popular dockside restaurant Rustic Inn overnight and ganked themselves 200 pounds of Maine lobster, 100 pounds of blue crab, 40 pounds of crabmeat, 100 pounds of Dungeness crab, 100 pounds of grouper, and 100 pounds of snapper.

All told, the seafood robbery is estimated at 640 pounds and worth $6,435, according to BSO.

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Florida Woman Awarded $25,000 for Having to Shake Bra During Traffic Stop

Categories: Floriderp

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Wikipedia Commons

Zoe Brugger was pulled over in Lakeland last May for a busted headlight, but what happened next had little to do with that. The 29-year-old was forced to lift up her shirt and shake her bra in an attempt by the cops to find drugs.

The incident was caught on video, and cops later searched her vehicle before coming up empty on all accounts.

Brugger, though, came up money.

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Pulitzer Prize-Winning Author Says It's No Surprise Florida Cops Were Linked to KKK

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U.S. Information Agency, via Wikimedia Commons
The Ku Klux Klan on parade down Pennsylvania Avenue.
The nickname of Fruitland Park, Florida, might be "The Friendly City," but something sinister is lurking behind the Lake County city's fa├žade of Southern hospitality.

Deputy Police Chief and Fire Chief David Borst stepped down last Thursday after the FBI confronted him with evidence that he was involved in the Ku Klux Klan -- the white supremacist group that emerged following the Civil War and is known for its conical hats.

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Florida Woman Arrested for Doing Naked Yoga on the Highway

Categories: Floriderp

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Namaste.
Police in Ocala yesterday responded to a public call about an apparently crazed woman doing yoga in the middle of a road. On their way to the scene, someone else phoned 911 to inform them the lady had begun "stripping in the streets," according to the probable cause affidavit.

Wearing nothing but panties, with her jeans around her ankles, 51-year-old Michele Cernak was placed in handcuffs shortly after twisting herself into a pretzel. About 10 feet away, officers noticed a running Chevy GMC pickup truck. Cernak confirmed it was hers.

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