Your Annual Reminder to Not Fire a Gun Into the Air Tonight

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Hi. Hello. How are you? Happy New Year.

Oh, and by the way, please do not fire a gun into the air at the stroke of midnight tonight.

It happens every year. We mean, every year.

So we're here with our annual reminder to not do that, because it's dumb.

Seriously, the old year ends, the new one begins, and people suddenly turn into Mexican bandits from an old Western and fire their pistolas into the air in celebration, not accounting for the fact that GRAVITY IS A THING and that the bullets do come back down.

And then innocent people die or get seriously injured.

In the last few years, we've seen some tragedies over the meaningless act of firing into the sky.

In 2010, a 6-year-old boy was seriously injured at a party in Miami when a stray bullet hit him.

In 2006, two Delray Beach residents were hit by celebratory bullets.

In 2007, a 35-year-old Liberty City father of five was hit in the top of his head by a falling New Year's Eve bullet..

So, yea. Don't be an asshole. Keep the gun locked away and fire off a bottle rocket or some sparklers instead.

Or dump some Mentos into a Diet Coke bottle and make a neat soda fountain and amaze your friends. You'll all be wet and sticky, but nobody will get a bullet lodged into the top of their skulls.

For those who need a primer, it's pretty friggin' simple:

The bullet of a gun fired into the air will typically travel up to a mile into the sky. But, since outer space and zero gravity is higher up than a whole mile, the bullet will fall back down to Earth. It's just a matter of where and on whom.

Sure, it may not be traveling back down as fast as it went up, but bullets are typically shaped like bullets and therefore are still going to travel back down at lethal speeds.

Celebratory gunshot deaths happen every year. Without fail.

Cops ask that you please immediately call 911 if you hear gunfire in your area. Then head inside. If some jackass pulls out a revolver at the party you're at, leave right away and call the cops.

Seriously. No celebratory gunshots, people!

Happy New Year!

Send your story tips to the author, Chris Joseph.

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2 comments
KennyPowersII
KennyPowersII topcommenter

South of the border has come north of the border. How dare you mess with their time honored traditions. It is ingrained in their culture.

smdrpepper
smdrpepper

Yeah, I really wish the people who live in the neighborhood behind my house would listen.  They were shooting a LOT into the air last night, even pausing long enough to reload.  9mm, 45, and even an AK shot off into the air.  At least I was close enough to them that nothing hit around me.

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