Five Last-Minute Christmas Gift Ideas — From Craigslist

$249Full Penis Chess Set - One of a kind! - $40 (Kendall)
Perfect Gift For: Friend's sister, girlfriend (two to five weeks), the social chair at the fraternity, CFO of the company, headmaster of the upper school.
This... is a chess set... made of hand-carved dongs. High-brow, low-brow, see? See what they did there?

Vintage Retro Dragon Engraved Bronze Pocket Watch Necklace Steampunk - $17 (Miami Fl)
Perfect Gift For: You (Hey, it's been a stressful holiday season. Treat yourself).
I mean, this is pretty badass, right? Imagine: Q: Hey dude, do you know what time it is? A: Of course, good sir. Just let me pull out my dragon-engraved pocket watch, pop open it's dragon-engraved metal cover, and have a peek.

How often does life give you the chance to say that?

Used panties worn by pornstar ;) (miami fl)
Perfect Gift For: College symbiotics professor, friend's fiance, boss (only if he works in government or finance)
Come on, you didn't think we could put together an accurate list of the wares on Craigslist and not include used panties? These, however, are prime product, at least if you believe the provenance. Doesn't say which porn star wore these bad boys, but we're sure the customer service representative on the other end of the transaction can fill you in more. And hey, at $30, that's a discount... we hear.

Happy holidays!

Send your story tips to the author, Kyle Swenson.

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Did you really have to add that very last gift idea...gross 8)

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