Five Thoughts on the Dolphins Victory Over the Browns
photo via Cody Moore
Dion Jordan got the first sack of his career! It was also the only tackle he had in the game.
If he can keep bringing the heat, along with Cameron Wake on the other side, the Dolphins pass rush is going to pucker many a quarterback's sphincters so hard in the coming weeks, they're going to explode.
You hear that, Tom Brady? Your asshole is going to resemble the floor of our driveway after the Forth of July when we're done with you!
Super Terrific Disgruntled Dolphins Happy Hour
One game into the season -- a win, no less -- and the Dolphins are already dealing with not one, but two possible disgruntled situations.
First off, there's Mike Wallace, who caught 1 pass for 15 yards, while Harline got most of the targets and ended with the better game.
Reports said that Wallace refused to talk to the media afterward, and when asked about the game plan, he told people to ask the coaches.
Mike Wallace's exact words after the game: "I don't want to talk. I don't feel like talking about it. Ask coach." #Dolphins— Andrew Abramson (@AbramsonPBP) September 8, 2013
One game into his Dolphin career, and Wallace is already being an asshole about his looks. And after a win.
Mike Wallace. Doesn't understand how people can be gay, doesn't get passes thrown at him. Poor little lamb.
Meanwhile, Randy Starks, who was demoted during the off-season, apparently (allegedly?) shot a bird at the coaching staff after he recorded a sack.
"Now, now, now, that's not very nice, there, Randy. I know what that finger means. It means I should fornicate with myself. Now, that's no way to conduct ourselves," Joe Philbin probably said.
Conclusion: A win is a win, and the Dolphins won, so let's all be happy. But, really, they played a team with shit quarterbacking and a coaching staff that apparently doesn't realize they have Trent Richardson on the squad. Next week against the Colts should be a real test for Miami.
Let's hope Tannehill can keep up his solid play, the defensive line can keep crushing it, Mike Wallace can catch a few more passes, and Randy Starks can not shoot the bird at any more people.