18 Reasons Why Gators Fans Are the Worst
They smell. They're loud. They drink cheap beer. They love to wear jorts. They love mullets.
And they're set to invade Sun Life Stadium for the big showdown with the Hurricanes on Saturday afternoon like an orange STD, infecting every crevice of South Florida like a horde of toothless, insufferable zombies.
Members of the Gayterrr Naytion are the worst.
How bad are they?
Let us count the ways...
Here are 18 reasons why Gator fans are the absolute worst:
Because of That Godawful Gator Chomp
It's like a horde of troglodytic halfwits who don't know how to applaud properly. DERRR CHOMP CLAP.
Lookit! Ahm imitayten a gater'z mawth with mah armz!
Because They Act Like Imbeciles When They Win
It's never enough that the Gators win a game. Their fans have to YELL it at everyone within earshot between sips on moonshine and makeout sessions with their cousin that the Gators are the greatest football team in the history of everything.
Because They Act Like Imbeciles When They Lose
In 1980, the Canes kicked a field goal to run up the score against UF. Gator fans proceeded to throw oranges at the Miami players and coaches on the sidelines. Because apparently, only the GATERZ are allowed to run up the score, like Steve Spurrier and Urban Meyer did EVERY FUCKING CHANCE THEY COULD. Or the infamous "Gator Flop" game against Miami in 1971.
Because 99.999% of Gator Fans Have No Idea What "The Gator Flop" Game Is...