18 Reasons Why Gators Fans Are the Worst

Because They Call Their Stadium The Swamp

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Because nothing says football like a wet, muggy, vile, disgusting piece of shit land that smells like a whorehouse. Swamps are the taint of the Earth. They're wet. They're hot. They stink. And they're unpleasant in every way. So actually, The Swamp is the perfect name for Gater Nation to inhabit.

Because of Their Insufferable Lack of Self-Awareness

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The Gater Nation LOVES to talk up the Nevin Shapiro scandal. But it conveniently fails to remember that 44 Gator players have been arrested since 2005, which is an NCAA record.

GAYTERR CHAWWWMP.

Because They Still Refuse to Admit That the Gators Have Always Been Afraid to Play the Hurricanes

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Never forget: The Gators chose to end their annual game against the Canes during the peak of Miami's dominance in the '80s. COINCIDENCE? No.

And they recently did it again when UF athletic director Jeremy Foley gave some cockamamie "financial" reason the Gators won't be playing Miami again for a while following Saturday's game.

Scurrrrred.

BECAUSE THEY WORSHIP THIS FUCKING GUY

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19 comments
Michelle Singer
Michelle Singer

This is just an angry Nole writer. I know your school sucks, bro. But you don't have to take it out on us.

Lynne Dear
Lynne Dear

thanks for reminding me... Need to get my Gator flag up in my Nashville neighborhood!

jpl4k3
jpl4k3

Wow, this "author" is a sack of shit. He should be embarrassed by publishing this trash, it makes me wonder if he even got accepted to ANY university. I myself am embarrassed to be a Hurricanes fan with the way this moron represents us.

KennyPowersII
KennyPowersII topcommenter

"Gayterrr Naytion". 

Really? Had to use a homophobe reference as a put down? Shame on you.

andyschein
andyschein

There's a reason this guy blogs for the Broward Palm Beach New Times and not the Sun Sentinel... He got rejected from UF

LoganB
LoganB

1.  I don't think Miami should be worried about STDs when it has the highest AIDS rate in the US.

2.  Thank God for animated GIFs right?  Otherwise it would have been pretty tough for you to actually WRITE an article.  This seems more like an illustrated slam book of why you're upset about receiving your UF rejection letter.

3.  Usually people number the reasons when they make numbered lists...

jkbane
jkbane

Classy article 

johnnie_zoolander
johnnie_zoolander

#19 Because they show up to the stadium... even when their team isn't playing

lish1981
lish1981

Talk about bitter. I would be too if I was a Cane fan

boom2323
boom2323

@lish1981 I have no idea why we would be bitter. UF has nothing on the UM legacy. You have no idea what you are talking about.

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