Hollywood Man Puts Up World's Creepiest Craigslist Ad

Categories: WTFlorida

manny.jpg
"Come with me, baby. You won't regret a thing.
Hey there, college girls. Do I have a deal for you.

As you can see from my Craigslist ad, if you act now, you may have a chance to live with me, a man who can do you right. Aren't you tired of all of those dweebs around campus? They probably can't even bench 150 pounds. Chumps.

Not like me, baby. Not like me at all.

See also: Seeking Arrangement and Other Sugar Daddy Sites Help South Florida Coeds Get Out of Debt

Let me tell you what I'm going to do to you once I get your fine, fine behind in my Hollywood pad.

First, I'm going to teach you all about a little thing called financial independence. Then it will be all about "e-Commerce business with complete WEB Master and SEO functions," because shhhhhhh, that's what I know you like. After you're pocketing a cool $1,500 per week, you and me will have lots of time for the "beach, fine dining, exercise, fitness, exotic trips to Las Vegas, Hawaii and Paris and elsewhere."

I'm going to make things real secure for the both of us. You're not going to need to worry about all of your college debt again. How, you ask, am I going to do that?

I'm a professional Body Builder. You see my muscles? Does it look like I'm smuggling pounds of smoked ham? (Because I'm not.) I'll put you on my broad back and carry you to all the "Las Vegas shows." What's more, I'll bring you along for a dinner with my friend, "The Rock." Maybe you've heard of him.

So why wait? "You can continue on just surviving on delusional hopes with untested boys or you can...Move forward with you life."

Life is about choices... choose this body-building sugar daddy today.

Love,

The creepiest man on the internet... Manny

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29 comments
Stephanie Rose
Stephanie Rose

oh god i hate men like this. please take some estrogen supplements men like this- please not exist anymore

Jennifer Nanni
Jennifer Nanni

LMAO! I think Dwayne The Rock Johnson should kick this guys ass just for using his name in this creepy pathetic ad

Erik Ace SobeArtist
Erik Ace SobeArtist

i cant drink enough bleach to clean myself after reading this yes not even showering with bleach will help! lol

Tim Kling
Tim Kling

Any girl that answers this ad deserves to go missing.

Nicole Ashly
Nicole Ashly

Financial independence taught by someone who cannot distinguish their from there...

Christine Haycook
Christine Haycook

Alejandra Galeana did you tag me in this cause you think I should go for it...??

pamelahaley
pamelahaley

Sounds like all the wonderful promises my ex-boyfriend made to me. right before he began secluding me from the world, lying to my friends and screaming in my face  about what a lying whore I am whenever he stuck his dick into some trailer park skank and popped out a new kid.

Bud Bob
Bud Bob

Someone should tell him about the lump on his right breast

smdrpepper
smdrpepper

I now have to scrub my brain and eyes for having read that.

Rachel R Levy Lewis
Rachel R Levy Lewis

He seems lonely. I'm sold. Has the position been filled? Do I have to have student loan debt to qualify for the position? Because that would motivate me to go and get my Master's degree....

Brandon Hill
Brandon Hill

Ohhhhh, come on. It's a lil compelling! hahaha

rdragonss
rdragonss

@Bud Bob LOL I't probably a pace maker!

pamelahaley
pamelahaley

@mccoy.terrence @pamelahaley I know... I totally forgot to mention he was an e-commerce Web Master and SEO Guru too. Not the same guy. Just eerie similarities.  I ended up with some SEO skills and a couple of cats which is epically better than the bastard kids the other 3 gals ended up with ;)

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