Florida Man Masturbates Outside Woman's Home Three Times

Categories: WTFlorida

So, Angie Roberts was arriving home from a bike ride Wednesday afternoon when she spotted a dude jerking off behind the bushes outside her house.

When the man spotted Angie, he walked over and asked her if she had a boyfriend, like a pimp.

Shockingly, Angie told him she did not.

Because he was not done yet thoroughly creeping her the shit out, the man asked Angie if she worked out.

Angie ignored the man and walked into her home. When she looked out her window, she again spotted the man spanking the monkey.

According to a Greenacres police arrest report, 19-year-old Melchisedech Anivain Isoph of Lake Worth, was arrested on three misdemeanor counts of indecent exposure after he whacked it outside 43-year-old Roberts' Gladiator Circle home.

Roberts says Isoph stood there, polishing the helmet, for a solid ten minutes.

Apparently, Isoph walked back and forth between his bicycle and the bushes while he jacked it a total of three times, according to Roberts.

Not wanting a strange dude fapping outside her house, she called the cops.

Roberts said she felt like she needed to stall for time for the police to get to the house, so she took her puppy outside.

Isoph then took this opportunity to ask Roberts if she needed a dog sitter.

The cops eventually arrived. Isoph explained to them that he was "only peeing" behind the bushes.

Roberts made it clear that he was not peeing.

Isoph was booked into the Palm Beach County Jail late Wednesday and released Thursday morning.

"It's like he didn't care," Roberts told the Sun Sentinel. "I started thinking, my window's open -- is he going to break into my house? This guy wasn't stopping, so I was thinking, what's he going to do next?"

Probably feel bad about himself and then take a nap, would be our guess.

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People should understand that the old jokes of the guy in the trenchcoat are exactly that jokes. Exhibitionist jump from 0-60 in the serverity of their crimes. The guy showing off his stuff in the Wal-mart parking lot this morning, is the same freak crawling thru your kid's window tonight. The first woman who encountered him did everything wrong..never let one of these freaks get within conversation distance, never walk into where you live, "they" make mental notes of it and they come back. If women are uncomfortable with a firearm, (which I dont know why they would be) after a couple of sessions at the range, then they should carry mace or a stun gun . Women should determine what is their personal Boundaries of space, be able to access the threat "on the spot" and act accordingly. Unfortunately many women are "surprised" by the intrusion and react too slowly. Women are natural targets for these freaks, KNOWING that when you walk out your door everyday will give you an edge to react in real time which probably will save your life. These freaks dont get any real time, they are turnstiled thru the corrections system quickly. It will be only a matter of days before he does this again.

Rachel R Levy Lewis
Rachel R Levy Lewis

In the same night?! Wow! Hie must have found the greatest masturbation lotion ever!

Sharon Aron Baron
Sharon Aron Baron

“This is malicious fecal distribution,” the man said. David...best quote eva!!!!!!!

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