Everglades Voted Least Sexy National Park

greategreteverglades.jpg
Courtesy of the National Park Service
Two South Florida parks, the Dry Tortugas and Biscayne National Park, have been voted part of the Top Ten "Sexiest National Parks" in America on sugar-daddy travel website MissTravel.com, a "destination-dating" site that hooks up "attractive" travelers with "generous" ones.

According to the company's public relations manager, Jennifer Gwynn, 8,500 single American travelers who are also members of MissTravel.com participated in the survey. Most of those polled were women, with ages ranging from 23 to 30 for women and 34 to 41 for men.

The Dry Tortugas, a gorgeous group of islands off the coast of Key West that house some of the nation's healthiest coral reefs and aquatic life, were edged out of the winning slot by sexiest public lands alive Zion National Park, located in (an apparently much underrated) Utah. Miami's Biscayne National Park landed in the "it's an honor even to be considered" seventh place.

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Screengrab from MissTravel.com
The Everglades finished dead last, however, but was in good company with Yellowstone, which also mysteriously lost. Ah, well -- users who enjoy vintage sexist ads like the one to the right probably wouldn't understand the unique beauty of our River of Grass anyway.

"I can't imagine that a romp in the swamp is at the top of many travelers' bucket lists," Gwynn said. However, she noted that travelers surveyed did not elaborate on what combination of features create an ideally lusty Garden of Eden.

Probably one that doesn't necessitate mosquito nets.

If you'd like to jet-set via MissTravel, you better be a looker. If you're not but you want to travel with a member, be rich and willing to take your fetching travel mate on shopping sprees. Ladies, creepy vacations equal "frequent flier miles." What a deal. Watch the video below:




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2 comments
icculus17
icculus17 topcommenter

keep it classy!

Sandy Martin
Sandy Martin

Have you been to Mammoth Cave? It's bad ass!

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