New Pope Wanted: South Florida Craigslist Has Want Ad for A New Pontiff

Categories: Broward News
pope benedict.jpg

In case ya haven't heard, Pope Benedict XVI has given his three-week's notice to God. The 85-year-old Pontiff, who was once part of the Hitler Youth and went out of his way to protect pedophile priests, told the Vatican that he's stepping down due to being inflicted with old.

"Before God, I have come to the certainty that my strengths, due to an advanced age, are no longer suited to an adequate exercise," he reportedly told the Cardinals early Monday morning. He said this in Latin, so we're just going to have to take the Italian press' word for it.

In any event, South Florida Catholics are responding to the news of the first Popequit in six centuries. But one enterprising South Floridian took to Craigslist to put up a want ad for a new Pope.

"I'm surprised that he's resigning, because [Pope] John Paul served until the end of his life," Jaime Zambrano, a worshiper at St. Edward the Confessor Catholic Church in Pembroke Pines, told the Sun-Sentinel. "I like the path the church is on and I'd like a conservative pope to follow Benedict."

"He's putting the church before himself," another parishioner said.

The Craigslist post -- which is a brilliant piece of satirical art, if you ask us -- mirrors what a lot of non-Catholics (and non-believers) are feeling about the whole thing.

The ad says, among other things, that the requirements to be the new Holy Father include a high school diploma or GED. A working knowledge of the Bible (Old or New Testament) is also recommended, but not required.

(Click on the screen cap below for a larger view)


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11 comments
ChazStevensGenius
ChazStevensGenius

Outside of NAMBLA and the Catholic organization, where are you going to find individuals with real world experience turning away criminal investigations into child rape?

Hey, I know.  Someone get the Boy Scouts on the horn.

winsomelosesome
winsomelosesome topcommenter

I guess it's funny. 

Just gets so tiresome to see the continual bashing of an organization, with all of its faults, that has done so much to help humanity.  This will probably bring a litany of the horrendous crimes committed under the banner of the Church but I, for one, will not lose focus on the good this religion has done for countless men and women over the last 1500 years or so.

KennyPowersII
KennyPowersII topcommenter

I just messaged Mickey Rourke a k a The Pope of Greenwich Village

winsomelosesome
winsomelosesome topcommenter

@KennyPowersII @winsomelosesome 

Go on with your blind life. I gave you at least 5 concrete examples.  You do not want to believe. You have preconceived notions that nothing will change.

You have given me bromides.  Addios

KennyPowersII
KennyPowersII topcommenter

@winsomelosesome Science trumps faith. BTW, you did not come up with one thing that was accurate. You referred us to an article that made nothing but unsubstantiated claims.

winsomelosesome
winsomelosesome topcommenter

@KennyPowersII @winsomelosesome 

You asked me to name ONE good thing.  I didn't ask you to name any bad things. You make statements with no  proof.  I would never call anyone's faith, or lack thereof, "deceit and fairy tales."  I, among millions, live my life according those "fairy tails"as you so inaccurately call them. You would not be writing this in english without the Irish  Monks.  Oh, never mind.  You're gonna believe what you believe.  I should have known that with your question.

KennyPowersII
KennyPowersII topcommenter

@winsomelosesome  

I could argue most of Miller's claims in the proper venue, using local examples. Foremost the Catholic church, not unlike every other religious branch , spreads ignorance with fairy tales and deceit. Their stances on birth control are primitive at best. Their hospitals and education institutions are anything but non profit. Their tax exempt status on the local levels is undeserved and unfair. Lets not forget periods in history where they were at the forefront of misery and injustice. The Spanish Inquisition. The sell out by the papacy to Mussolini in exchange for a sovereign state status. These are just a few of the highlights.

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