Power Rank Friday: A Wise Jurist, Drizzy Eats His YOLO, and the Sports Fans Among Us

The local personalities, egos, and public figures who swung through the news cycle this week, ranked by New Times' crack research department using a highly scientific algorithm (i.e., charting the hip jiggles of the 4 p.m. early-bird dancers at King of Diamonds).

5. U.S. Rep. Patrick Murphy. Just for not being Allen West.

4. Broward Judge John "Jay" Hurley. Judges see a lot of weird crap. But props to Broward's Hurley for leveling common sense at a batshit situation. Stripper Arlene Mena was arrested after pulling some weird moves on A1A in Hallandale Beach involving a tossed traffic cone and other disorderly conduct. In court, Mena claimed she was just unleashing some performance art. Hurley didn't buy it. "I suggest not wearing boots and doing artwork in the middle of a roadway," he quipped, according to the Sun Sentinel. "I would start right there and everything will start looking up for you."

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