Broward County Name Change: Eight Options That Are Way Better

Categories: Broward News
other hollywood.jpg

The Other Hollywood County
Yes, we know. Tourists, we've heard. In this land, another realm called Hollywood doth exist. And yes, they're all like, "We have models, movies, and drug-addled people who actually are talented!" But then we're all like, "Do you have the Pride of the Seminole Nation at your doorstep?" On the Res 4 life, motherfuckaaaahhhhh.

Burnout County
There are few places in the United States that have such a powerful, metaphysicial pull on the nation's washed-up. They come for beaches, but not hassles. Palm Beach County -- who's got money for that? Miami -- no hablo espanol, Pedro. You know who we're talking about. Long scraggly hair. Too much cocaine/marijuana/opium/smack/bath salts in the past. Prowling the Hollywood Boardwalk, probably selling shit no one in existence needs.


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3 comments
FatHand
FatHand

Remember when Miami-Dade briefly changed to Miami-Wade during the summer of free agency? I suggest a permanent change to Broward-Bosh County.

freeplanet
freeplanet

This change could benefit local tourism. However, the cost of changing building signs, park signs, stationery etc would be borne by the public. It's much easier to quantify the estimated cost than the number of additional tourists. Same old story: socialized costs for privatized profits. If the beneficiaries of this expense had to pay for it by some kind of surtax, my guess is that it would be soundly rejected. Now, if somebody could make an argument that changing our brand name would raise all of our property values, the cost could be negligible compared to the overall benefit to the County in higher tax revenues.. The problem is that its pure speculation this change would have that kind of benefit. Did Miami-Dade benefit from the change? If so how much and who were the beneficiaries? How was it calculated and is the figure reliable?That same money could be spent on homeless shelters, school busses, park improvements etc.

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