Top Seven Reasons Broward Beaches Are Better Than Miami Beach's

By Chris Joseph Tue., Oct. 2 2012 at 10:30 AM

Sure, summer is officially over, but this is South Florida. It's summer here practically all year long. And as the snowbirds begin to descend upon our cities, it's high time we take a look at what the best beach options are for us -- if going to the beach to lie out, take in some sun, and have a drink or two is something you find awesome.

Sure, Miami Beach is sexier, hipper, cooler. But this list is about beaches.

Once you peel back the deco-colored veneer, what you're left with is sand, sun, and ocean. Here now are seven reasons Broward beaches are better than Miami Beaches:

7. Getting Around
South Beach is cool for cruising and having people look at your car and judging you, if that's your thing. But beaches in Broward are built around the simple concept that people just want to go to the beach and do beachy things. Arrive, park, get out, lie down. Boom. There's always parking to be found with meters or garages, and there are no overly congested streets littered with hipsters on their scooters or douchebags in their convertibles.

6. Trendiness
South Beach is trendy! Ooh look at me with my mojito making a duckface for a picture in front of the Clevelander! Fuck trendy. You want trendy, go to the Sawgrass Mills Mall, hit up the Nordstrom rack, and buy yourself a pair of chinos. Otherwise, who gives a shit? You came here to enjoy a day at the beach. Sand, sun, wind, alcohol, swimming. Sure, P Diddy may not have sat at this particular Hollywood bar, but the booze is pretty much the same exact shit they serve anywhere else on Ocean Drive. And cheaper too!

Tags:

We Recommend

GFuego13

Miami beach got more people but Broward got a nice beach!!!! @NewTimesStreet @MiamiandBeaches @visitlauderdale @NewTimes_BPB

NewTimes_BPB

@GFuego13 you may be on to something there #beaches cc @NewTimesStreet @MiamiandBeaches @visitlauderdale

GregFromDelray topcommenter

Damn. some people really love their nude beaches.....I am biased since I live on Fort Lauderdale beach, but the boardwalk in Hollywood definitely better than SoBe....SoBe is really kinda played out at this point...must be because all of our sports team practice and have their games right on SoBe...

dfabulous1

@SuciasOfMiami broward beaches SUCK

Gobble

I think you are way off on #4! Have you seen the revenue Haulover generates for Miami? Broward could most definitely benefit from a similar draw!

Also I take great issue with the fact that you complain about people on South Beach judging you and then you turn around and judge the people who are comfortable enough in their own skin to enjoy it the way it was meant to be enjoyed. "Look at all these beautiful people on South Beach, why are they looking at me? They must be judging my Target apparel purchased on my journalist salary! I'm going to go cry into my mojito before wandering North to make fun of people with far better tans."

penelope.g

1 Like

@Gobble Relax Debbie Downer.

Gobble

@penelope.g Nah man, nude beaches are awesome and having a nude beach in Broward would be awesome but its assholes like this guy that won't even let the idea hit the table because "ew naked people."

I can think of 100 more reasons why Broward beaches are better than Miami and "no nude beach" is not one of them!

Gobble

Im not even middle aged! (Only 25)

penelope.g

1 Like

@Gobble You totally just burst my bubble MISS Nudist! :/

Gobble

@penelope.g I am a woman! Nice assumptions there!

penelope.g

1 Like

Well, Mr. Nudist, if you feel so strongly about HAVING a nude beach in Broward then by all means DO IT, or whatever. Just not in Hallandale. Or Hollywood. Or Dania. Or any other Broward city already taken. Because I don't need to be building sand castles with my kid while you're hanging out a few feet away from me, lettin your hairy balls fly free -- not that there's anything wrong with that. :)

Gobble

@penelope.g I certainly do take my naked ass to Haulover so dont worry your pretty little head about that!

But if no nude beach is a TOP SEVEN reason why any county's beaches are better than Miami's, it must be the TOP SEVEN reason for every other beach in Florida... since Haulover is the ONLY nude beach. That does not make Broward unique, it makes it like every other freaking county. It was stupid to put it on the list.

Also you can think an article is stupid or even find an aspect of an article stupid and still think the person who wrote is funny overall.

I am simply stating that "no nude beach" is not a good reason and the arguments given for why this writer thinks it is a good reason are juvenile at best. Celebrities all over the world visit nude beaches, lots of young pretty people visit nude beaches, saying they are full of uggos is just wrong and ridiculous.

Like I said before, Dade is the only county with a nude beach so saying "hey! come to Broward! We are just like the other 65 counties in Florida that don't have nude beaches!" Is really pointless.

penelope.g

1 Like

@Gobble 1. If you think they are so awesome, take your happy naked ass to Haulover where you are more than welcomed to expose your "ew nakedness" 2. I think this asshole is pretty funny. 3. I can think of 100 more reasons as well, but this blog is about the TOP SEVEN! So, hey!

Rj Petrucci

Broward Beaches are better because they are in Beach Towns not next to a big city with silly immature attidue and lots of urban scare --- do not get me wrong South Beach was fun 15 years ago -- but it seems that they are ever rude to the shrinking gay community there and allowing far too many Urban Weekends. Plus Miami Beach is over developed. I prefer palm trees by the beach not highrises and gates. Pretty easy answer on this one - Broward! (Key Biscayne is in a class by itself.)