Teen Shoots Himself Through the Penis and Testicle

Categories: Floriderp
shot through penis.jpg
"Just chillin, cleaning my gun, bro..." BLAM!!!!! 

Good morning, Pulpsters! Had breakfast yet? Hope so. Because we got a story about a dude who shot himself in the cock! Happy Wednesday!

A Port St. Lucie teen bought himself a gun (always a terrific way to start a story, ain't it?).

So there he was, cleaning his gun, as people with guns are wont to do, when all of a sudden the gun went off and the teenager shot himself through his penis and testicle.

Cops say 18-year-old Michael Smeriglio lied to them, initially saying someone had shot him as he walked down the street. But after further questioning, Smeriglio confessed.

Can't blame the kid for not wanting to 'fess up to the truth.

Also, just one testicle? HOW ACCURATE!

Doctors told WTSP that the bullet went through his penis and his left testicle and then lodged itself in his thigh.

GAH.

Smeriglio told cops that he had purchased his gun at a party, which is probably the most Port St. Lucie thing to ever happen in Port St. Lucie.

According to the Daily Mail, the teen's Facebook page has pictures of him and his bros leaning on BMWs and in front of mirrors.

While investigating the incident, cops found marijuana inside the home where the cockblast happened. That led to the arrest of the homeowner, 22-year-old Joseph Lamar, who was booked on drug charges.

And although the ending of the story sounds unfair because Lamar got caught thanks to his friend being too stupid to unload his gun while cleaning it, keep in mind that his friend shot himself in the dick.

It's all about perspective.



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11 comments
yaya4yaya
yaya4yaya

Well, the schools offer courses in driving and sexuality, they should've thrown in herbal gardening and firearm ed. into the home ec. curriculum...  However, we should take note that teenagers know EVERYTHING so junior, ya' did teach us something-- unload the gun before pointing at your genitals and to the poor guy arresed in this mess---  you're TOO OLD to be hanging around kids who THINK they know everything!

Steve Ellis
Steve Ellis

Early in life to be a Darwin Award winner!

lonianderson1979
lonianderson1979 topcommenter

I am more shocked that cops arrest the home owner for having marijuana!! Such a waste of time. Personal use, privacy of your home, fucking nazi's!!

James Stewart
James Stewart

Does he get to keep his junk? or does he have to go shoping makeup?

James Stewart
James Stewart

Does he get to keep his junk? or does he have to go shoping makeup?

KennyPowersII
KennyPowersII topcommenter

Career minded individual learning on the job. Professional junk shooter.

RomneyIsNOTTheAnswer
RomneyIsNOTTheAnswer

 @lonianderson1979 yeah, being shot through the dick was punishment enough!   And booze is far more dangerous than a little weed.   Wise up law enforcement, deal with the real ills of society!

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