Tampa Mayor Says He'll Cancel RNC If Isaac Threatens

Categories: Tropical Life
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(not actually Isaac... DO NOT PANIC)
Tampa Mayor Bob Buckhorn says he'll cancel the Republican National Convention if Tropical Storm Isaac becomes a real threat.

As of Wednesday morning, Isaac is becoming a real threat.

"Well, absolutely, we're prepared to call it off," Buckhorn told CNN this morning. "I mean, safety and human life trump politics. I think the RNC recognizes that."

But we thought God only attacked poor people with hurricanes! WE'VE BEEN DUPED!

Meanwhile, Rick Scott, who is slated to speak at the RNC, has issued a statement:

"Although Tropical Storm Isaac is still far from Florida's shores, we are closely tracking the potential for the storm to impact part or all of the state, including the Tampa Bay region during the Republican National Convention. Florida's state emergency management team and local emergency teams have been working closely with convention officials and have been planning for this event for more than a year, and the possibility of a hurricane hitting the convention has been part of that planning process.

"I am confident in our preparation, and the decision process in place to ensure the safety of both our residents and visitors during the convention.

It would be a real shame for Isaac to break up the RNC's party. What with all the visitors, GOP dignitaries, Senators, congressmen, and the whole officially making Mitt Romney the nominee thing.

There's also the GOP Homocon party with all them gay Republicans in attendance.

Actually, that might explain Isaac.

God: Gay Republicans gaying up the Tampa area? Holy Myself, that's outrageous! SOMEONE SWITCH ON THE HURRICANE MACHINE!

RNC Host Committee CEO Ken Jones says he's not yet worried, and that if the storm does hit during the convention, the Federal Emergency Management Agency and emergency management team will take charge and get all those visiting GOPers to safety.

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Jones says that, no matter what, Romney will officially be made the party's nominee, once everyone is safe.

"You've got to get that legal function out of the way," Jones said. "Once you figure how to do that without anybody getting hurt, you make sure people are safe you get them out of town and to an alternate location."

Let's just get Mitt nominated, and then every man for himself!!!

Isaac is forecast to pass near or south of Hispaniola and in the general direction of eastern Cuba over the weekend. As of 2:00 p.m. today, a hurricane watch has been issued for Puerto Rico, the U.S. Virgin Islands and the southern Dominican Republic.




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