Inside Florida Puppeteer Robert Brown's Alleged Plans to Eat Children

The eye is real; the hair, it appears, is quite fake.

Our Miami compatriots told you yesterday about Robert Brown, the Tampa children's entertainer arrested this week on charges he was planning on kidnapping a child to rape, murder, and eat him -- quite literally the stuff of nightmares.

He claims it was all just fantasy -- which, though it's unseemly, would not necessarily be against the law. But he was allegedly talking about a child he goes to church with, so the police scooped him up.

Now, we, the iron stomachs of the Pulp, have waded into the disgusting muck that is Brown's criminal complaint to bring you his fantasies as no other news outlet will -- that is, with all the gross stuff intact, because you are a grownup and can decide for yourself what horrifying public documents you expose yourself to.

A brief warning: If you were irked by that post we did of the sexts former weatherman Rob Lopicola allegedly sent to underaged boys, don't go anywhere near the rest of this story.

Police found Brown through the arrest of a Kansas man named Michael Arnett back in May -- investigators say they found that Arnett had child pornography and had gone into online chats where he had "extremely graphic discussions regarding kidnapping, sexually abusing, murdering and eating of children." He had two pictures on his computer of "decapitated children that have been bound and cooked."

One of the people Arnett allegedly chatted with (sometimes under the name "calf_keeper2") was Brown, who used the name "uelime." In one exchange allegedly between Arnett and Brown, Arnett was asking about a boy identified in documents only as (C). Here are several excerpts from a conversation in April 2011:

uelime: Sadly, he is doing well. I wish I had him tied and gagged in the closet.

calf_keeper2: he would make a fine Easter feast

uelime: yes, his thighs and butt cheeks would be fantastic for easter.

calf_keeper2: I agree. You could be spending today parting him out, getting a pan ready for the butt and thighs

uelime: I would have the time to do it today, if I only had him.

The two then get into discussing how "uelime" would go about telling the boy that he was about to be "cut up and eaten."

"I can assure him that he won't feel a thing because he will be dead by then," Brown allegedly wrote. "I could ask him how he wants each cut of his body to be done and then label it for him with a black marker... yeh, maybe a dotted line around the base of his cock with an arrow and label 'cut here.'"

And another conversation from August 2011. In this one, Arnett allegedly goes by the name "sweettalkerlinda."

sweettalkerlinda: evening sunshine

uelime: Hello

uelime: how are you?

sweettalkerlinda: I'm good. you?

uelime: Doing well.

sweettalkerlinda: any luck with your boy?

uelime: No, I still want to eat him though. He was looking good in his last pic that I got.