Florida's New Laws: Buttcheeks at School Bad, Clove Cigarettes Good
State Sen. Gary Siplin finally got his wish -- no more asses hanging out at public schools.
Siplin has been trying to pass his "droopy drawers" law for years, and now it's on the books that repeat offenders of derriere exposition can face suspensions.
The law specifically states that districts must put bans on students "wearing clothing that exposes underwear or body parts in an indecent or vulgar manner or that disrupts the orderly learning environment."
First offense is a verbal warning and calling mom and pop; the second offense bans the student from extracurricular activities for a week and requires a meeting between the principal and parents, and the third offense ups the after-school activity bans, another chat with the parents, and an in-school suspension of three days.
Long story short, pull your pants up and get a belt, for the sake of humanity.
The governor also signed the repeal of a ban on selling clove cigarettes, so if you like smoking things that taste like a Christmas tree, you're in luck.
The ban was never exactly followed in the state, so they wasted about as much time banning them as they did un-banning them.
A bill legalizing no-handed-bicycle-riding, however, died in a House committee. Impressing mom with no hands on the bike will still cost you $15 in Florida.
Having sex with animals is still legal until October 1.
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