Understanding Your Comcast/Xfinity/NBC Bill

broken tv.jpg
Flickr user: schmilblick
Monthly Statement*

$21.95 -- Xfinity TV

$54.95 -- Xfinity Performance Plus Internet

$6.12 -- Digital starter (We have no idea what this does.)

$1.74 -- State communications tax

$17.98 -- Broward County corruption tax

$64.23 -- Tax for electing Rick Scott

$11.13--  FPL rate hike

$39.84 -- Subsidy for first season of "Outsourced"

$79.81 -- Alec Baldwin's 401(k) plan

$99.99 -- We have exclusive rights to air the Olympics until 2024

$7.04 -- Lease for RCA modem made in 1993

$29.45 -- Service fee for fixing broken modem

$19.99 -- You weren't home for the service appointment

$81.79 -- We didn't show up, either!

$31.54 -- Your wireless router doesn't work with our modem

$12.22 -- Ant removal fee

$38.88 -- Endless WSFL-TV reruns of "Everybody Loves Raymond"

$41.30 -- Somehow this goes to the GEO Group

$15.13 -- You cheered for the Dallas Mavericks last night

$62.23 -- HOA fee for your foreclosed neighbor, whose cable you are stealing

*inspired by the New Yorker

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6 comments
The Pulp Blog
The Pulp Blog

Just to be clear, does the Broward corruption tax go toward helping stop corruption or create it? If it's creating it, then it's totally working.

freakerdude
freakerdude

$43.50 -- calling us about your cable network related problems

Bozo
Bozo

Love it !

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