Jupiter Farms Woman Thinks People May Be Eating Her Family's Pets

Categories: News
Hillbilly-Goat--21630.jpg
freakingnews.com
If your family's pet goats go missing and your first inclination is that somebody ate them, you might live in Jupiter Farms.

But that's what Stephanie Tesley tells the Palm Beach Post she believes happened, apparently very distraught over her family's missing goats.

"I know a lot of people don't understand how we can love pygmy goats so much, but we do," she told the paper. "They're part of our family. It's killing us. It's killing my children. It's killing my husband, and it's killing me."

Two weeks ago, one of their pygmy goats, Gracie, went missing. They went looking for their pet, to no avail.

Then Weebles and Sugar went missing yesterday morning.

Again, the Tesleys went searching for their goats but again could find no trace of them.

The fence they keep their goats in on their property is much higher than the goats could hop, and Tesley says it's not likely they climbed the fence.

The Tesleys filed reports of theft with the Palm Beach County Sheriff's Office on both occasions, but it hasn't found the goat thieves either.

So why does the family believe its pets are making their way to dinner plates?

They don't have an answer, but there has to be some reason that their first thought is that someone has to be munching on a big bag of goat jerky right now.

If you know someone who may have a tendency to eat goats, engage in goat-involved satanic rituals, or just has a penchant for general goat thievery, the Tesleys ask that you give a ring to the Palm Beach County Sheriff's Office.


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6 comments
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Model Citizen
Model Citizen

Hey there copper, Mr. Crime Stopper, what is wrong with what we’re doing? We just like to dance in our goatskin pants around this ancient ruin.

KennyPowersII
KennyPowersII

Goat meat was the stuff the street vendors, around the old Orange Bowl, sold as "meat on a stick", for $2. They set up their little Hibachi grilles and lawn chair and toasted the treats pre game. Stuff was good. Whenever I asked what meat it was, their heads would just bobble up and and down like a dashboard doll and flash that toothless grin, they all seemed to possess. It's a Hialeah & Little Havana delicacy.

Aphradonis Telemachus Nyxhelio
Aphradonis Telemachus Nyxhelio

It was better from the link above - "Jupiter Farms Woman Thinks People May Be Eating Her." Hahaha how could one be unsure about THAT?

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