We hate bombs, hate radiation, and (most of us, some?, no?) hate getting groped by strangers, but America, it seems lately, we can't have our safety and keep our dignity too. People are really upset about this, and it's great that they give a damn, because it would be really awful otherwise. But truly, a boycott day
to screw with the rest of us who will gladly sacrifice our dignity to make it home for Thanksgiving is not the answer. Not a single unwillingly grab-happy employee at any one airport can change the policy. And guess what? TSA workers really don't want to touch your junk
. They didn't sign up for this either. So, let's direct our attention where it matters, at the TSA
... and in the meantime, let's soak in the entertainment of some truly *grabbing* graphics. Have a happy Thanksgiving; don't let a little x-ray nudity or second base get in the way of that. And go ahead and keep getting angry about stuff -- just keep it rational, and don't delay my flight, damn it.
Here are our top five graphics to lighten the mood and to address some interesting, though not necessarily productive, implications of the new security tactics:
5. These T-shirts ("Your Naked Photos Are Safe With Us") are the precursors to next year's upgraded and equally obnoxious "F.B.I. Female Body Inspector" Halloween costumes.
4. Then there's the straightforward approach to capitalizing on TSA-themed graphic design.
|via jeffpruett.wordpress.com|3. This is kind of cool. They guy covering himself in the middle gave us a laugh. But more than a graphic that makes us giggle, the New Republic published a pro-body scanner article and an anti-body scanner article. Anyone who wants to read something smart about this issue instead of exchanging rants and grunts would be well-served checking these out.
2. If you're hot, you might hold up the security line. So, for everyone else's sake, wear baggy clothes, oh wait, doesn't matter. Which brings us to the photo after this...
1. What do body scanners and veganism have in common? Only PETA is capable of connecting these dots.
For real, though, safe travels, people. Airports at Thanksgiving were nightmarish even before we had to get naked and felt up.