UPDATED: What Is the Sheriff's Mustache Hiding?

Flickr: sergio goldvarg

Batman and Lamberti in the same photo. So that's not his secret.

​You may have noticed there's been a pause since we unveiled the fourth most formidable mustache in Broward and Palm Beach counties. That's because we were really hoping to get a comment from the man behind Mustache No. 3: Broward Sheriff Al Lamberti. And it's become clear that those hopes have been dashed.

On Tuesday, I began a letter to BSO staff thus:

Dear BSO media relations,

I'm writing to request an opportunity to interview Sheriff Al Lamberti or, if the sheriff is not available, then someone qualified to speak on behalf of the sheriff's mustache.

I then explained how this was not a joke. It's for a very serious, very worthwhile cause: Movember, the charity that encourages men to get sponsors for their mustache growth during November, then to give those raised funds to aid research against prostate cancer.

In my note, I listed the questions that were, apparently, too hot to handle. Here they are:

1. When did you first grow your mustache? When you did so, did you have the support of friends and family?
   
2. Why are mustaches so popular with men in the law enforcement community?
3. Your colleague to the north, Ric Bradshaw, also wears a mustache. Would you care to offer a critique of his? 
4. In your estimation, what actor/musician is the world's leading mustache icon?
   

Maybe the sheriff is saving the answers to those questions for his memoir?

UPDATE: When it comes to media extortion, sometimes the end, justifies the means -- I spoke with Lamberti on Friday afternoon. He didn't even try ducking any of the tough questions above. I'll be posting that interview first thing Monday morning.