Huizenga Defeats Obama

In a press release just sent out over the wires, the Miami Dolphins announced that Stephen M. Ross now owns 95 percent of the franchise and Dolphin Stadium. Combined with the 50 percent of the team Ross purchased last February, Ross and Wayne Huizenga officially sealed the deal on an additional 45 percent ownership stake. Huizenga will retain a five percent share of the team and stadium, and 50 percent of the land. Also, he will not be exposed to the cruel Big Government taxes that will surely follow the inauguration of a Democrat (Here's where H.Wayne spits on the ground) president.

The move, which was pre-approved by the NFL during a meeting in October, means that effective immediately, Ross will take over as General Managing Partner.

Jump for the comments from Ross and Huizenga, released to the media.

"I want to thank Wayne for his outstanding stewardship of the Dolphins during his years as the team's owner," said Ross. "During that time he transformed the South Florida sports landscape and has been a model owner of the Dolphins. I know I join all our fans in expressing our appreciation to Wayne for all he has done for this community.

"In addition, I want to assure Dolphin fans that I share Wayne's same passion to win and will do everything I can to support Bill Parcells in his leadership of football operations. I also want to thank Jeff Ireland, Tony Sparano, and the entire football staff as they continue the mission they began a year ago to bring the Dolphins back to the Super Bowl."

"It's been a privilege and honor to have served the fans of this special franchise as principal owner, and with the closing of the sale I want to wish Steve well in his new role as the team's Managing General Partner," said Huizenga. "After 19 seasons of ownership, the sale represents a bittersweet moment for me, but the timing is right to complete it. I know under Steve's leadership the Dolphins are in outstanding hands. We are still a 5 percent partner in the franchise and the stadium. The Huizenga family and organization will do everything we can to support Steve and the team for the benefit of all of South Florida."