DeGroot For Sheriff

The latest from John DeGroot, who is now in the running for Broward sheriff. Hey, the guy has worked at BSO and the Attorney General's Office and wrote a play about Hemingway called Papa. What else do you need?

Seems he was spurred to join the wannabes by the news that Assistant U.S. Attorney Jeff Sloman is in the running. DeGroot didn't like it. Not because Sloman was involved in the Jenne investigation, but because he golfed with former Jenne crony Carney.

Dear Florida Gov. Charlie Crist

Please accept this Pulp Blog as my official application to become Interim Sheriff of Broward County.

In other words: PICK ME!

Why not?

After all, I put my pants on one leg at a time like the other 19 people who want the job.

Plus I know how to work the elevator in the Broward Public Safety Building – which gives me an advantage over a number of the other candidates.

My reasons for wanting the job are simple enough:

One – I’m retired and have nothing better to do.
Two – I could use the money.
Three - According to today’s Herald, you’re “impressed” by Miami’s Assistant US Attorney Jeff Sloman to replace Ken Jenne as interim Sheriff of Broward County.

Okay.

It was Item Three that pushed me off the edge.

I mean, are you really “impressed” by the former golfing buddy Tom Carney who served as Jenne’s Undersheriff and partner of record in his sleazy side dealings – to say nothing of Slick Tom’s role as the bull-shitting architect and founder of

PowerTrac?

Because if Carney kept his golf score the same way he tallied BSO’s crime stats …?

But apparently you’re un-vexed by Sloman’s past friendship with Jenne’s sidekick in sleaze, having told the Herald:

“There’s a number of things that make (Sloman) an impressive candidate.
“I think he certainly would have the opportunity to (lead BSO) with a sterling record and a great ethical background.”

Puh-leeze, governor!

Like did the Herald reporter catch you after too much time under the sun lamp?

Oh yes.

The Herald also say’s Jenne’s Criminal Defense lawyer Dave Bogenschutz believes Sheriff Sloman would “be good for Broward” … which, in Broward, means he’d also be good for Bogenschutz.

But I digress.

Point is, I’m officially declaring myself as the 20th candidate to seek the office of Interim Sheriff of Broward County.

Why should you pick me?

Well first, having been married three times, I do “interim” well (I was the sixth husband of my second wife.)

Second, you have my word that I will NOT put my name on anything but my paycheck -- which will be an historical first in Broward politics.

And finally, as Interim Sheriff, I promise to join you on your next trip to Israel with your Miami Demo pal Dan Gelber. Hell, I’ll even bring the sun lamp in case it’s raining in Jerusalem.



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