Bring Me The Head Of Che Guevara

Categories: News

That's Felix At Left

A former CIA agent who tracked down Che in the mountains of Bolivia says he believes the supposed remains of the revolutionary behind held in Cuba are fake. Gustavo Villoldo, a Cuban exile, says he knows this because he kept buried Che himself. And he claims he has a lock of the dictator's hair to test for the DNA.

It's just the lastest curve in the continuing intrigue surrounding the capture and summary execution of Che, as Luisa Yanez reports in the Miami Herald. What is truly weird about this claim is that Villoldo has waited until now to tell about the lock of hair. He didn't even put in a 1999 book he wrote about Che.

I don't know what to think. You can't believe any CIA spooks, least of all Cuban exiles who were half-mad with revenge against Castro and were involved in all kinds of American-sponsored shenanigans back in the day (remember Operation Mongoose?). The man on the left in the picture of the defeated Che, for instance, is Felix I. Rodriguez. He went on to star in the Iran Contra affair while working under George Bush I. It's rumored he has more than Che's hair. Yeah, they say he has the guy's hands in a jar. And Felix admits to taking the man's watch. You can read about him in Florida Pulp Nonfiction.

But this here looks like another mystery that won't soon be solved, if ever. Maybe the DNA doesn't match, but how do you prove that the hair belonged to the Marxist? Is there any other Che DNA out there?

After the jump: Tony Light Weight?

Alright, St. Louis Cardinals manager Tony La Russa is slumped in his car snoozing at a green light when cops found him. The Palm Beach Post's Joe Capozzi describes the scene:

"The dark blue Ford Expedition sat through two cycles of green lights at Frederick Small Road and Military Trail, its engine running and the sound system blaring so loudly that the music could be heard from the street through rolled-up windows.

Inside, Tony La Russa, manager of the World Series champion St. Louis Cardinals, was slumped over in the driver seat, his foot on the brake, oblivious to the honking horns of cars behind him, according to a Jupiter police report."

So La Russa had to be smashed out of his skull, right? Well, he says he had just two glasses of wine at Da Vittorio with singer Vic Damone and former Phillies slugger and Hall of Famer Mike Schmidt. He blew just .093, which indicates more than two glasses, but not exactly a roaring drunk. Damone told Capozzi that La Russa wasn't drunk (nice pull on that interview Joe).

Police, however, contend that he admitted to "several" glasses of wine. Hey, maybe it was just two giant glasses. I'd like to see the bill from the restaurant. Even if they were buying it by the bottle an idea could be had as to whether he's telling the truth. Either he's lying or La Russa is giving a bad name to the long and storied tradition -- anchored in the legends of Babe Ruth and Mickey Mantle -- of drunken Major Leaguers. C'mon, two glasses of wine and he's passed out on the road?


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