Beatdown 2012: Ten Songs Waka Flocka Flame, DMX, Fat Joe, Travis Porter, and Fabolous Should Perform

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Both the immortal words of Ol' Dirty Bastard, "I'll beat your ass," and LL Cool J's signature saying, "momma said 'knock you out'" are fitting themes for the upcoming Beatdown 2012.

See also
- Waka Flocka Flame Gets Pawed by "Ferocious" Fans in Fort Lauderdale
- Top 10 Wackiest Waka Flocka Flame Rhymes on Tripple F
- Mike Tyson on the Obama Machine: "Sounds Beautiful for the Working Class People"
- Mike Tyson's Undisputed Truth Is an Intense Self-Portrait of a Complex Character

WBA fighters and hip-hop heavyweights take center stage at the BB&T Center, presumably to cheer up Panther fans still pissed off over this year's NHL lockout. Featuring several title bouts, Beatdown culminates in the headlining fight between Joan "Little Tyson" Guzman and Khabib "The Hawk" Allakhverdiev for the vacant WBA light-welterweight belt.

If that's not enough to get to you gorging on bloody slabs of steak while swigging scotch and puffing your favorite Dominican cigar, Flo Rida, Waka Flocka Flame, Fat Joe, Travis Porter, Fabolous, and, the Mike Tyson of hip-hop, DMX will be performing to fuel the bloodlust. We don't know about you, but we're doing lines of coke while brooding at our shirtless reflection in the bathroom mirror in preparation for this fucked up fiasco.

To help get you pumped with testosterone, we created this mixtape featuring songs we hope to hear at Beatdown 2012. Please enjoy while you resume glaring at your reflection, asking it menacingly if it's talking to you.

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Top 10 Celebrities Turned Rappers: Metta World Peace and Hulk Hogan

Categories: Good Ideas
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Warren Beatty as Jay Billington Bulworth
History shows that it can take a good long while to really break through in the hip-hop game. This is true, even more so when rapping is your second attempt to claim some fame in this lifetime (#YOLO gone wrong). Though you may be a natural at wrestling, basketball, or singing like a chipmunk, that doesn't mean you also have it like Biggie. 

Even so, many celebrities have tried. Many have failed. Here are ten people famous people who felt compelled to follow their hip-hop dreams. More »

Lady Gaga Is Today's Ani DiFranco; Here's Why

Categories: Good Ideas
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Di-Gaga! They kinda could be cousins, no?
About a year ago, I reviewed Lady Gaga's Monster Ball show at American Airlines Arena. She spoke endlessly and earnestly with the audience, offering them a slew of unwarranted but well-received bits of advice. Though not the aesthetic, the activity and energy reminded me of an Ani DiFranco concert circa 1995. To mark my words:
Not since a 1990-something Ani DiFranco show has so much talking been heard coming from the stage at a concert. The funny thing is, Lady Gaga's performance last night was as heartfelt, loving, unironic, and sincere as an Ani show. (If you're too young to remember DiFranco, please use Google.) It's like Mother Monster's got all of Madonna's gimmicks -- the Jesus, the cone boobs, etc. But she still comes off like DiFranco -- kinda gay, caring but strange, though less earthy, definitely less earthy than Ani.
Since Gaga launched the Body Revolution 2013 this week, celebrating the human form in all of its many unusual shapes, my feelings on the subject have been solidified. And now I'm certain these two Italian-American non-trad divas are more than just a little similar.

See also

Five Reasons to See Lady Gaga in Fort Lauderdale

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Whitney Houston and Donna Summer Drag Fundraiser at Lips; Host Diva Talks Women in Distress

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Here's Diva!
Diva, the lead host at Wilton Manor's drag hotspot, Lips, thinks that calling this Sunday's dinner and show dedicated to Whitney Houston and Donna Summer a "dead diva's tribute" is a little morbid. But, well, sadly, these ladies are dead, and, man, were they divas. 

The night's festivities won't be all wigs and boas just for the fun of it. A fundraiser for the national organization Women in Distress, the tribute is about more than the individual. Whereas every day at Lips promotes female empowerment (and female impersonator empowerment), this Saturday does so especially. 

"After a couple of years at Lips, I really wanted to give something back to the community," Diva says. "So I talked to the owners, and we looked around, and Women in Distress really stuck out."
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Bon Iver Announces Spotify Remix Contest: Five Producers Who Should Enter

Categories: Good Ideas
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Mountain man crooner Bon Iver is responsible for some of the most heartfelt sensitive-bearded-guy ballads since Michael McDonald. His mix of transcendental folk and Hawaiian-shirt wearing yacht rock yielded some pretty sweet records, which we at County Grind may have cried to once or twice. Naw, just kidding. We didn't actually cry. Shut up, OK? Let's not talk about it...

Anyway, Justin Vernon, or Bon Iver, or JV (we prefer JV), in cahoots with Spotify and Indaba Music, is taking the somewhat popular trend of open-source remixing and calling it the Stems Project. Basically, you sign up at Indaba Music, you download all the individual parts of JV's Bon Iver, Bon Iver record, make a remix of whichever song you desire, and submit it. The winner gets a grand for the song and it'll be on Spotify as part of Bonny Bear's remix album. Simple.

Since this contest is marketed more toward bedroom producers (AKA dudes who still make witch house), we'll probably hear a lot of dark dandy-sounding shit. Which is cool, but we wanna hear some real outlandish weirdness. So, here's a list of producers who might actually make a Bon Iver remix sound kinda interesting.

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Heartthrob Playing Cards! Bieber, Drake, and RPatz with Rod Stewart's Hair and Mole (PICS)

Categories: Good Ideas
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All images created by Alex Izaguirre. 
We were sitting over here at New Times hitting the bong hard, listening to "Maggie May," and our minds wandered to thoughts of Rod Stewart. High on life and THC, we got lost in this moment of nostalgia for a more youthful, sexually alluring Rod, and suddenly, inspiration struck. Though a fit of giggles, we coughed up a sort of brilliant idea: Why not put old Rod's most defining characteristics, his hair and mole, on the heartthrobs of today? What's Justin Bieber gonna look like when he has old man spiky blond hair? Click on to see more of how well the dreamiest boys of today will look in fifty years.

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Adrian Grenier's Band the Honey Brothers' Video Shoot Shuts Down Radio-Active Records (Video)

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Mikey Ramirez
You might remember, a few months back, the Honey Brothers took over Radio-Active Records to shoot their "She's Got No Love" video. The pop-folk, indie, Paul Simon-sounding group's big claim to fame is that its drummer is dreamy Entourage actor Adrian Grenier.

Director Ari Gold created this charming and heartwarming video. Not Jeremy Piven as Ari Gold as a music video director but the filmmaker by the same name. Why'd they pick Radio-Active as their set? Well, it is one of the raddest record stores, well, period, to be certain. But also, a gig at the area's W led these boys south and over to this Fort Lauderdale gem.

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Subculture Presents Sincerely Yours, Marty McFly at The Classic Gateway Theater on July 14

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Public domain photo via Wikimedia Commons
Arriving in a DeLorean is optional.
Last month, we introduced you to Subculture, a company of community organizers and music enthusiasts led by Phillip Roffman. In our interview with Roffman, he expressed a desire to band together likeminded locals from various artistic scenes, and mount cross-disciplinary events. Now, the first of these is coming. Mark your calendars for Sincerely Yours, Marty McFly, which takes place on Saturday, July 14.

For the evening, Subculture is transforming the Classic Gateway Theater in Fort Lauderdale, a South Florida cultural staple, into the '80s. The evening centers around a double feature of iconic movies from that decade: the teen-angst anthem The Breakfast Club, and everyone's favorite time-traveling, freaky-friday-esque cult favorite, Back to the Future.

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90 Miles Away: Crazy Hood Film Academy Needs a Little Bit of Your Help

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Ever wonder what the underground hip-hop scene is like in Cuba? If you're Cuban-American, first, second, or even third generation, ever wonder why you feel so strongly about the island though you only know it through pictures and abuela's stories?

Lifelong friends DJ EFN and Garcia -- esteemed members of the local hip-hop community since the early '90s -- have wondered just that. They're now trying to find out what's happening just 90 miles away. They, as Crazy Hood Productions, need a little bit of your help to create an upcoming documentary/recording on the state of hip-hop within the political isolation of Cuba today.

That's right, and here I will not pussyfoot about anything fearing an Ozzie Guillen-like backlash, these two dudes just want to connect with their familial roots first, and secondly, see how their art has flourished under the extreme conditions of the Castro regime.


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Pool Party's Creep Guirdo Demands That Ponderosa Not Name Their Next Album "Pool Party"

Categories: Good Ideas
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Please, have some respect for bare chested greaseballs.
Editor's Note: Creep Guirdo, frontman of the band Pool Party and local character responds to Southern rockers Ponderosa's announcement that their new album will be called Pool Party. We've chosen to let his goofy-guy vernacular stand without edits. Enjoy. 

Hello my faithful friends from Broward and Palm Beach, I am Creep Guirdo from the band Pool Party. You probably have - or maybe haven't, I don't know - seen me and my sexy band play sometimes at the Snooze or the place that closed down called Monterey Club or the place with the high ceiling and good bass speakers, Green Room. If you seen my band, you know that we take our name very seriously. We have rules about what a Pool Party is, we adhere to them, and we expect everyone to understand, agree, and do the same.

So, imagine how I felt when I got this press release that a band called Ponderosa is making an album named Pool Party. I felt pretty honored, assuming they were going to be covering all of our songs - I read the song titles, these are not Pool Party song titles. Pool Party song titles are "Pool Party Yeah," "Pool Party Party," and "Pool Party Wut," not "Navajo" or "Black Hill Smoke," or "Cold Hearted Man" - those are Hardy Boys book titles; no offense to Franklin Dixon, or Frank and Joe Hardy.


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