The Ten People You'll Meet Out in Hollywood, Florida


5. The Stay-at-Home Stoners
This category may or may not go out to my neighbors. 'Sup, guys? Just kidding. They wouldn't read this. Anyway, these are the people who see the daylight only when they emerge from their houses to meet with a dealer in a heavily tinted car parked out front. The whole situation always seems a lot more suspicious than it is, but they are definitely just buying weed. They might give off sketchy vibes, but when it comes down to it, they're just a bunch of lazy potheads hanging around all day, probably watching Fast Five whilst perfecting their smoke rings. Harmless.


4. Bus Stop Junkies
Now these guys, they're on a whole other level. They mess with some hard shit, to be frank. Loitering about the bus stops, they get uncomfortably close and reek of an unidentifiable stench. Some of them yell; others talk to the air. And it's not like they're homeless, oh no. One particular man -- a personal favorite -- dances to an iPod almost every afternoon. And to be honest, he's got some moves. These folks are just loaded the hell up on Lord knows what. Looking like Breaking Bad extras, we can't help but wonder where they're headed on the off chance they actually step onto a bus.


3. Moochers
These guys want to be cross-county commuters but are too damned lazy and unproductive to do it themselves. They constantly badger others to see, "Yo, you headed down South tonight?" because they carry the mindset that their problem is obviously and inherently someone else's responsibility. With these guys, there seems to always be something wrong with their car, so they're in constant need of a ride to hit up Mansion or Space. They are straight-up leeches, and if you help them out once, they will never, ever stop hitting you up.

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