Ten Signs Your Date Loves Drugs
George Martinez This is your date on drugs.
An inevitable part of being involved in club culture is, at some point, you will date a person who loves drugs.
Many folks you'll find at a concert, festival, or dive bar appear as if they partake fairly regularly, and -- unless they are very unlucky genetically -- you can assume they do. But it takes a special kind of person to like really love drugs. This list will help you identify whether the guy or girl you met five drinks deep, inside a darkened, bass-heavy, sweaty space at 3 a.m. is someone who will occasionally become intoxicated using illegal or nonprescribed substances or if he or she is someone who simply adores only the possibility of snorting, rolling, or puffing the night away.
1. They've been drinking for hours and hours and are never drunk.
So, you're probably going to need a drink to warm up to your date. Sober first dates? They're horrible and sweaty in a bad way. You're gonna get a little sloppy and try to smooch this person you barely know, so you have to lube up.
But when it's like way after midnight and your date has been pounding PBRs since 6 and never catches a buzz, it's clear he or she loves cocaine.
2. Their teeth are eternally grinding.
This is always an obvious sign that they are either rolling hard on old ecstasy or new Molly or enjoying a bit of meth or good, old-fashioned cocaine. Nothing unsexier than a jutting jaw. Lose their number.
3. Dilated pupils.
Dilated pupils are so the most obvious sign your date is enjoying some psychedelic fare. Now, the types of trippy drugs like microdots, mescaline, or mushrooms that really get your pupils banging, they've fallen out of favor with the club set, but if you met your date at Bonnaroo, then they are probably watching your face melt right now. If you met them at Ultra, they are feeling their own face melt.
Keep in mind, some people just have big pupils, so don't rely on this one bit of evidence alone.