10 Musical Genres and What it Would Be Like if You Were Addicted to Them





8. Psytrance
The effects of an addiction to the psychedelic techno variant known as "psytrance" include the chronic inability to stop dancing like you have to pee while your entire body is simultaneous covered in slimy beetles or grasshoppers or something. Also, the psytrance addict can only feel the effects of other drugs when dancing to psytrance, which only compounds this terrible addiction's capacity for life-ruining destruction. Friends don't let friends dance to psytrance!



7. K-Pop
"Gangnam Style" broke all of those YouTube records because the crossover Korean pop mega-meme introduced North American popular culture to its most dangerous addiction since the C.I.A. put crack cocaine in the ghetto. The C.I.A. is responsible for PSY, too, BTW.



6. Vuvezuela Drone-core
Much like cigarettes, its hard to imagine how somebody ends up blowing a vuvezuela nonstop, at all hours, for seemingly no reason other than to feel their solar plexus tremble in resonance with this ancient instrument's cosmic vibration. All it takes is one night of self-destructive bad decisions and nihilist-hedonist choices for you to end up feverishly sucking on a kazoo in a sketchy stairwell.

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