Nicki Minaj Is Voting Romney and Ten Other Stupidest Rap Lyrics of All Time

Categories: Bad Ideas
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Couple of days back, Lil Wayne released the fourth installment of his bulldozer mixtape series Dedication with the apt title Dedication 4. Obviously, it's fucking great. The Dedication tapes feature an impressive roster of talented guests at the peak of their careers. They've set a high bar for all other artists to reach. (Seriously, why don't rappers consistently put stuff this good out?)

One guest, divisive-as-fuck Nicki Minaj, appears on "Mercy," where she spits probably her best verse ever. Flexing hard on a bad bitch roll, Nicki wrecking-balls the shit out of this track. "All you niggas want some Nick cake/If you eat ass I got a thick plate" and "'cuz all you do is boast and argue over hoes, so all you niggas toast cuz all y'all deep throat." Man she's goin' in (possible middle-finger verse at Funkmaster Flex?).

She also has a line where she surprisingly says: "I'm a Republican voting for Mitt Romney, you lazy bitches is fuckin' with the economy." Guess what? This made the lazy people of America crazy (j/k). Do Nicki's political views lean more Mitt than Barack? It would make some sense, since the GOP is as much a circus as Nicki's wardrobe choices. Does the GOP even know who Nicki is? Doesn't Mitt Romney look like the dude who's gonna repossess your house?


C'mon guys. Context. This entire track is an exercise in hubris and vanity -- Nicki is showing off her shit. She's a Republican in that she has money, and we're all lazy as fuck, not being Nicki Minaj with our lives (looking at you, Funkmaster Flex). She opted for the metaphor over the simile -- a very common rap-verse motif.

We understand rap slang can be hard to keep up with -- there seems to be a contest to provide the most non sequitur colloquialisms, possibly for the sake of confusion? Urban Dictionary is there for a reason (don't lie and say you don't look something up on there after hearing a rapper say it).

But this isn't the case here. This is simple poetics that involve some basic comprehension and critical-thinking skills.

So you guys don't get shit twisted, here are some lyrics that are actually ridiculous and make no sense. You can also take this as a best lyrics of all time list too.


Young Dro - "Shoulder Lean"
"Pearl Bent', cockin' hammer, Arm & Hammer propaganda/Bitches think I'm pimpin' and leanin' in salamander sandal."


Lil Wayne - "Green Ranger"
"Uzi go zit-zit-zit-zit-zit-zit-zit, that's pimples."


Nicki Minaj - "Bedrock"
"Maybe it's time to put this pussy on your sideburns."


Paul Wall "Thinkin' Thowed"
"My rims are 23s so they old enough to drink."


Rick Ross - "Diced Pineapples"
"I'm so fly that I shouldn't even walk."


Lil Wayne - "Bill Gates"
"I don't drink champagne. It make my stomach hurt."


Gucci Mane - "Never Too Much Money
"
"Gucci all red so he shittin' on the infants. He shittin' on the infants, Gucci all red man, these shoes $450."
(WTF????)


Rihanna, featuring Drake - "What's My Name"
"The square root of 69 is 8-somethin', right?"


Nas, featuring DJ Khaled - "I'm On"
"I need a vasectomy."


50 Cent - "I Don't Wanna Talk About It"
"I fuck the baddest bitches. I don't wanna talk about it."




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