Kourtney and Kim Take Miami: Five Places Off South Beach They Should Visit
The Kardashians are here on South Beach, getting kittens and hugging all up on each other while shooting Kourtney and Kim Take Miami. The filming allows you to be a tacky tourist in your own backyard. A spy in the house of Dash, if you will. Maybe you'll catch a glimpse of Kanye as he saunters out of Liv at 5 a.m. or spot Kim's ample bottom as it soaks up the South Florida sun rays -- all of them.
The sad thing for the K.s is that it seems they never fucking leave Miami Beach. We thought, since we in SoFla have a ton more to offer these Californians, we'd give the royal family of reality television a few tips on where off-the-playa they should visit. From Mount Trashmore to the Swap Shop, please open your mind, and read our justified suggestions.
5. Monkey Jungle
Nestled far, far south of the city, Monkey Jungle isn't just a place where people perverted for primates enjoy Sunday afternoons. It's super educational too! Mason'll go mad when he catches a glimpse of a silly orangutan pulling back his upper lip to show his fangs or a gorilla eager to throw your trash out for you (you littering sack of shit -- please see the video above). Sure the monkeys might throw poo at your head, but you know what? At least you don't have to go all the way to Costa Rica to get a true wildlife experience.
Note: Leave the new kitten home, Kim.