2 Live Crew's Five Nastiest Songs -- Hear Them at Delux Tonight!
The Crew's place in local music history is cemented in rock hard stone. Growing up in South Florida in the late '80s/early '90s, most of us had the most precious, most vulgar, most booty blasting tape safely hidden under all our other parent-safe cassettes. Underneath the Cassingle of Fresh Prince's "Nightmare On My Street" and purposely mislabeled "Ghostbusters," there it was, a copy of a copy Move Somethin'. It's an album that taught us every single word we weren't supposed to say.
Generally, these tapes were passed down by an older brother, somebody's older sister's boyfriend or, if you were lucky, an ambivalent parent who had no idea what kind of substance was stuck on that magnetic strip. If you were lucky an enough to see a real copy of a 2 Live Crew tape, a whole new world was opened up to you: motion blurred asses, fully dressed guys in hot tubs ogling at ladies who were little more than butt cheeks and high heeled shoes.
Yeah, Broward County Sheriff tried to pull them from Spec's and Peaches all over South Florida in 1990, but the Supreme Court had their back. Let's take a moment to reflect on the wordsmiths and their illustrious careers by watching (with headphones on, you don't want your mom, spouse or boss to catch you) five of their best video moments.
5. "Face Down Ass Up"
That's the way they like to fuck, ok? And, they didn't mind telling this intimate detail about themselves to Phil Donahue, an audience of Baby Boomers and everyone at home in America.
4. "Get It Girl"
Our favorite part? Besides the lady's spandex-hole-laden unitard and 2 Live's standard issue U of M gear, it's when Fresh Kid Ice sincerely tells the girl that her man can't satisfy her, he's her freak.
3. "One And One"
Okay, full disclosure, when I was nine and in summer camp, our counselors taught us this song. I remember walking in line, with 30 other nine year olds singing "Nine and nice, she licked my ass!" I also remember singing this in front of my older sister, she freaked out, and made it very clear to me that under no circumstances would I utter any 2 Live Crew Lyrics in front of our parents ever.
2. "Me So Horny"
Even though I really loved bad words as a little kid, I always preferred the censored version. "Sitting at home watching Arsenio Hall" is much more clever lyric than "sitting at home with my dick on hard." Fun fact: I had no idea this song came after Full Metal Jacket. When I saw that movie, years later, I was convinced that they made the Vietnamese prostitute sound like the girl in this song.
1. "The Fuck Shop"
After hearing this song, I was instantly taken back to a world of sexual pre-teen confusion. These lyrics, especially the ones about the girl being thirsty and the only drink she'll be allowed to have, are incredibly harsh. You may not wanna hear this one, unless you wanna feel as nasty as I did after hearing again. It's up to you. You are free to click play, or just go to the show instead where the lyrics may be less intelligible -- unless the backing track is an actual copy of their CD.
2 Live Crew. 9 p.m. Friday, September 2 at Delux Delray Beach, 16 E. Atlantic Ave., Delray Beach. Tickets cost $15 in advance, $20 at the door. Click here.
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