The Ten Longest Album Titles Ever

Categories: Useless Lists
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Marnie Stern is one of our ten artists with hella long album titles.
Album titles can be the most annoying or marvelous aspect of an artist's work. Judging by Goo, Sonic Youth's 1990 major-label breakthrough, or Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga, Spoon's 2007 retro-pop smash, titles can be as stupid as the music is sophisticated. But if the idea is to set the recording apart from all others, choosing a bizarre (but memorable) name like Zaireeka -- as the Flaming Lips did in 1997 -- isn't a bad strategy.

Upon hearing today's news that West Palm Beach experimental psychedelia outfit Weird Wives' full-length debut features a 29-word title, we got to thinking about other albums that are remembered best for being a mouthful of words. And there are plenty that zoom way past Modest Mouse's 1996 debut, This Is a Long Drive for Someone With Nothing to Think About, both in terms of length and syntax. We're talking album names that are so long that they piss off your iTunes library, they are certainly relinquished to a nickname of some sort, and they're probably complete nonsense.

Here are the ten longest album titles we could find -- each is 20 words or more, and we dare you to memorize any of them.

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10. T. Rex - My People Were Fair and Had Sky in Their Hair... but Now They're Content to Wear Stars on Their Brows (Regal Zonophone; 1968)

Words: 20

This title from the glam pioneers' debut album sounds like a limerick construction to these ears, and honestly it's one of the least strange of this list. We can't say the same for "Frowning Atahuallpa (My Inca Love)," the album's closing track, which features celebrated DJ John Peel reading a fairy tale penned by T. Rex frontman Marc Bolan. 


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9. Devendra Banhart - Oh Me Oh My... the Way the Day Goes by the Sun Is Setting Dogs Are Dreaming Lovesongs of the Christmas Spirit (Young God; 2002)

Words: 22

Oh... brother. This weird folkster isn't fooling anyone with the title of his second album. Although he has never been shy to pick strange titling for his songs as well ("Tit Smoking in the Temple of Artesan Mimicry" succeeds in proving that point), many of his lo-fi tracks are completely serious and beautiful. The acoustic "Pumpkin Seed" from this collection is one of his finest. Whether it is a "lovesong of the Christmas spirit," we're not so sure.  

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8. Mew - No More Stories Are Told Today, I'm Sorry They Washed Away // No More Stories, the World Is Grey, I'm Tired, Let's Wash Away (Sony; 2009)

Words: 23

The title comes from the lyrics for Danish rock group's song "Hawaii Dream." The piano-based ditty itself is only two minutes long, sweet and quiet, and arguably would have been a much more evocative name for their fifth album than what they settled on.

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7. Youthmovie Soundtrack Strategies - Hurrah! Another Year, Surely This One Will Be Better Than the Last; The Inexorable March of Progress Will Lead Us All to Happiness (Fierce Panda; 2004)

Words: 23

This English postrock act just seems to be pretty verbose all around. Look no further than "A Little Late He Staggered Through the Door and Into Her Eyes" from this collection. Clocking in at 6:08, it is the shortest song on the EP.

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6. Cap'n Jazz - Burritos, Inspiration Point, Fork Balloon Sports, Cards in the Spokes, Automatic Biographies, Kites, Kung Fu, Trophies, Banana Peels We've Slipped On and Egg Shells We've Tippy Toed Over (Man With Gun; 1995)

Words: 28

The album known to fans as Shmap'n Shmazz was the only full-length the influential Chicago emo act Cap'n Jazz ever released before it broke up. And really, how would you top this extended stream-of-consciousness? Dudes from the band went on to be in Promise Ring, Joan of Arc, Owls, and several other bands with much more reasonable titles.  


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10 comments
Jonas
Jonas

I'd like to add Suffocate For Fuck Sake's masterpiece „Blazing Fires and Helicopters on the Front Page of the Newspaper. There’s a War Going On and I’m Marching in Heavy Boots“ (22 words). :)

Alton
Alton

Nice list, but you missed Scott Matthew's Album "There Is an Ocean That Divides and With My Longing I Can Charge It With a Voltage That's So Violent to Cross It Could Mean Death" (26 words). ;)

Reed Fischer
Reed Fischer

Yeah. I figured something(s) might slip through the cracks. Good album?

Alton
Alton

Oh yes! :DWell, if you like Singer/Songwriter stuff, Ukulele and somehow depressing lyrics (to a certain degree). But it's not only sad stuff, there is hope in his songs, too. He has a great voice and I saw him live twice now (third time will be in October). I love his music.

Howard Rankowiz
Howard Rankowiz

The headline on the home page said this article was going to be about song titles but alas the article is all about album titles.   I wonder if the home page editor even reads the headlines?!?  

JJ
JJ

I'm pretty sure that Soulwax are Belgian, not British.

Reed Fischer
Reed Fischer

I'm positive that you are correct! Good catch. Fixed.

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