Vanilla Ice Launches Real Estate Website

Categories: Talking Shit
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"Back in the '90s, my album became the fastest-selling hip-hop record of all time... and it still is," boasts Rob Van Winkle. We don't even have to tell you that Van Winkle is Vanilla Ice, you live in South Florida, this is part of fourth-grade Florida history. So, the man known for the "still-fastest-selling-album-record-of-all-time" has taken it upon himself to show the average bro how to sell homes and make money fast.

To quote the Iceman, "She had me hot as a skillet taken from a flame, And my admission was free for me to ride on this train." Wait! Wrong quote, ahem: "After my record-breaking hip-hop album, I got rich all over again in real estate." This has been going on for more than 15 years now, but it wasn't until a reality show on DIY, The Vanilla Ice Project, became a hit that the whole world learned he can "pimp out properties and get paid."

So if you and your boys are sitting around with all these houses you bought -- but no one to sell to -- just go to his new Vanilla Ice Real Estate website and learn from the master. We do believe he is a master salesman. For no good reason at all, we bought his movie Cool as Ice when it came out on tape. Maybe it was so we could see the scene where he talks about "making sex" with the kid's older sister.



Now, we forgive Vanilla for pretending to be from South Florida. We don't blame him -- he settled in down here and bought a fancy-ass home on Star Island, complete with Extreme Sports Jet-Skis, motocross bikes, and a yin-yang on the front gate.

And he sold that home for $14.9 million.


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10 comments
richmond virginia real estate
richmond virginia real estate

 Vanilla launched a website and i have visit that site it is really useful for all of us who want to get more information about the real estate investment. This website update daily news about the home management and all information about the real estate market which is really great things for us. 

Herry Jhonsoen
Herry Jhonsoen

The Real Estate site and learn from the master is really important to improve business.There are no perfect reason but it bought the movie Cool as Ice and it is also easy. richmond real estate listings

johny anderson
johny anderson

Now, we absolve Vanilla for assuming to be from South Florida. We don't accusation him -- he acclimatized in down actuality and bought a fancy-ass home on Star Island, complete with Extreme Sports Jet-Skis, motocross bikes, and a yin-yang on the foreground gate. 

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Fj4
Fj4

I heard Sug Knight needs some help selling his 3/2 Bungalow in Coconut Grove.

novenator
novenator

This guy is the king of all douchebags.

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