Five Reasons Charlie Crist Should Not Pardon Jim Morrison

Categories: Useless Lists
Jim_Morrison_mug_shot.jpg
Wikipedia.com
Atoning for his sins against David Byrne won't be easy, but exiting Florida Gov. Charlie Crist has a chance to be supportive to the music community yet -- even if it's a completely misguided one. In a recent interview with the Hill, one topic discussed was the possibility of pardoning deceased Doors lead singer Jim Morrison for a 41-year-old indecent-exposure charge filed after a notorious Miami concert.

"Candidly, it's something that I haven't given a lot of thought to, but it's something I'm willing to look into in the time I have left," Crist told the Hill. "Anything is possible." 

Although there are plenty of eager commenters who'll make jokes regarding Crist having absolutely no problem with a strange drunk man whipping his dong out in public, a fellow staffer got that one out of the way already. Regardless, there are plenty of reasons this is a frivolous cause -- and five are below.

Jim Morrison did something awful that night. Whether he actually exposed himself or not is a big question mark, but enough of the Dinner Key Auditorium attendees that night became riot-ready based upon his drunken antics. "WAITAMINUTE" is nowhere on the "Touch Me" lyric sheet, and even the biggest Doors fans shouldn't argue that a performance that nearly wrecked the band deserves special commendation.

Jim Morrison's legacy isn't tarnished. Why does Ohio TV producer Dave Diamond hold on to a 41-year-old charge like it happened yesterday? Even if it did, today's desensitized public barely flinched following Justin Timberlake and Janet Jackson's Super Bowl "scandal," and countless rock stars in the public eye -- from Fall Out Boy's Pete Wentz to Kanye West -- have managed to persevere and thrive following indisputable evidence that they exposed themselves.

School ties shouldn't bind. According to the Hill, "Both Morrison and Crist attended Florida State University in Tallahassee, which Crist cites as one reason he is considering the issue." Hell, Scott Stapp also went to FSU and actually graduated.

Jim Morrison showed no remorse. In addition to this meandering interview (1:54) that basically perpetuates the rumors of his exposure that he gave after the incident, Morrison turned down a plea bargain offer that would have required the Doors to perform a free Miami concert and ultimately benefit the fans.

Jim Morrison is dead. A pardon is no joke. As the cases of Antonio Balta, Jose Torres, and other youth offenders in Florida, there are people who have lives yet to live that can feel the benefit more than some self-centered Doors fans. Had Morrison not died in a bathtub in Paris in 1971, he would have faced a six-month sentence for his deeds -- which likely would have been reduced to a fraction of what Lil Wayne and T.I. both weathered this year. Death-row inmates need Charlie Crist's limited time right now, and even the Lizard King at his slimiest would probably agree.


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