Ruth Bourdain's Answer To Alton Brown: Mein Fanf

Categories: Food News
Ruth Bourdain
Ruth Bourdain sets her own rules for dealing with celebrity chefs.
Ruth Bourdain, that crazy morph between Ruth Reichl and Anthony Bourdain, is at it again. In response to Alton Brown's Fanifesto, Ruth Bourdain has issued his/her own guidelines for fans on her Comfort Me With Offal blog.

Entitled Mein Fanf, Ruth Bourdain gives props to Brown for the idea, even though she admits it's "douchy". She/he/ then lays down the law by coming up with a few rules of her/his own on how to deal with celebrity chefs. Some tips/tricks include:

Bring a first aid kit to all Paula Deen events. There's a high probability you will be deep-fried.

When a celebrity chef is on book tour, keep physical contact to a minimum, unless you are bearing foie gras. Then, all bets are off.

If you go to a book signing with Nigella Lawson, try not to fall into her cleavage. You may never get out.

As with all rules, there are a few no-no's, like:

Please don't talk to celebrity chefs in a public restroom. That's what private restrooms are for.

Please don't ask a celebrity chef to talk to someone on the phone. Unless, that is, you have Ferran Adria on the line. God, I can talk to that guy for hours.

And, of course, there are some things that should never be questioned:

If Mario Batali asks you to shave his truffles, you do it.

To read all of Ruth's Mein Fanf rules, click here.
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