Stop Sending Me Pictures of Your Food on Twitter!!!

Categories: Musings
pfont-figs.jpg
Twitpic of figs taken by a Twitter friend Paulette Fontanez (@pfont)
A wise man named Shawn Carter, better known as Jay-Z, once said, "What you eat don't make me shit." Jiggaman was taking a shot at people who brag about how much money they make, not what they literally eat. His words, however, ring incredibly true in regard to the practice of taking shots of food and sending them to all of your followers on Twitter.

The dish you're about to consume will have no impact on my life whatsoever!!! Do not send me a picture of it!!!

Food-related Twitpics are the single most annoying aspect of Twitter. They're more annoying than the awful spelling, oversharing, spam bots, and everything else that sucks about Twitter combined.

Each day around lunch and dinnertime, I'll find a plethora of tweets that read like this, "Lunch time! Yum!" along with a link to a crappy, blurry picture of some tweeter's food.
  Nobody cares!!! Not one person who follows you cares enough about you to want to see the food that is about to enter your body!!!

I can't figure out how this awful trend started and/or why it continues. Did someone send out a tweet that said "I'm eating lobster" and one of their followers tweeted back "I don't believe you," which caused the lobster eater to bust out his camera phone and snap a pic to prove to everyone that he was, in fact, eating lobster?

And speaking of the camera phone, I'm going to sound like an athlete whose sausage just made it on Deadspin, but isn't this one technology tag team we could've done without? When Philippe Kahn gave us the camera phone or whatever it is he invented in 1997, is this what he had in mind? Give the people phones with cameras so they can send pictures of their junk or their food to all of their friends instantly? Some of you, I'm sure, are sending pictures of both your junk and your food. I'm not judging, though.

I'm not saying we should eliminate all pictures of food. Let's just keep them to menus, reviews, newspapers, blogs, and other things that are not Twitter. If you say you're eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, I believe you! No need for photographic evidence! Who would lie about eating PB&J?!?!?!

I guess really what I'm trying to say is, quit clogging up my timeline with your horrible food pictures and leave Twitter for what it was intended to be -- a place for people to talk about how awesome Justin Bieber is.

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