Is Everybody Happy? Half-Price Hell
|Kona's chicken tacos with obligatory confetti|
Clean Plate Charlie stopped in late last Friday and bit off way more than she could chew. For some reason, this China Doll was thinking Kona's $4 and $5 dishes were cute lil' "small plates," as sweet and compact as yours truly. It turned out they're in fact regular appetizers for half-price. So when the food started trundling out of the kitchen -- a Kona Pizza for $5.15, an avocado egg roll, calamari, and pot stickers for $4.75 each, and a vegetable roll for $3.15 -- there was barely enough room at the bar table to fit the feast. For about $23, this spread would have comfortably fed six people.
Well, let's revise that. Maybe not so "comfortably." On a scale of 1 to 10, Clean Plate Charlie gives the Kona food a solid 3.5. CPC couldn't, wouldn't, didn't wanna finish it. That paltry score is due in part to Kona's bizarre concept -- not so much an East-Meets-West Party as East Meets West: "It's a Train Wreck."
Take the "avocado egg roll." Some brainiac in corporate must've had the notion that all you need for great food is to combine every possible flavor and texture: crunchy egg roll, soft and creamy avocado, salty sun-dried tomato and pungent red onion, sweet honey-cilantro dipping sauce. What you end up with is a disaster of greasy fried stuff wedded to huge mouthfuls of warm avocado (CPC just wants to throw this out there: warm avocado is gross.)
|the fish tank is really cool, tho|
But hey: At these prices, you could order a bunch of food, drink a $5 Cosmo or a $3.50 Bud Light while you're waiting, take a bite or two of your satay or sliders, then wrap up the massive leftovers to take home to the kiddies. Easy way to feed a big family on a budget! And believe it, they'll get even bigger on this diet! Your porcelain princess is always thinking ahead here. So Aloha a hui hou! (Just practicing, I'll get my Hawaiian foodie fix in Honolulu next time).
700 Rosemary Ave. (at CityPlace)
West Palm Beach
--As told to Gail Shepherd